ya decided to remove tha outdated journal so im gonna talk about ma encounter with snakes

My country Malawi is home to tha 6th deadliest snake in da world the black mamba , its a very aggresive snake n its tha fastest on land i kid u not

some years ago i woz in tha bathroom n i noticed a smaller type sharing tha room so i grabbed a stick n hammered at it , big fockin mistake this asp woz dodging ma attacks n it gave chase so ma quickest decision woz to stand on tha loo , amidst tha terror i grabbed tha mop n got tha little sonovabitch trapped , i crushed his head n it woz a goner

another time i woz passin through a room n i usually passed through without turnin on tha lights
that day i decided to turn on tha lights n right in front of me woz a snake! i killed im too

another time i woz playin resident evil 1 n i woz playin tha level with a snake boss n guess what? i noticed a snake just behind tha tv in tha House! i killed it immediately

another time my wife shrieked n cried bloody murder when she found a snake in da house she sorta behaved like popeyes girlfriend , yah took care of that snake too

another time i woz makin a comic n tha lights had been a inconvinience so i woz using candle light
i dunno why but it seems creepy crawlies jus love tha dark cos next thing a snake passed under my leg... i jumped like my ass woz on fire n i nearly pissed myself, this woz recently so i really wasnt in tha best athletic shape but i got around to kill it

when i woz younger i used to occasionally run home from tha market so one time i jumped over what looked like a stick n guess wot, it wos a snake! i didnt kill it i jus left it alone

i killed a lotta snakes in ma life n i sorta jus gave up cos their too many!

Still we should have a greater respect for these critters i mean gangrene is tha last thing ya wanna catch